Dreaming Bollywood: Reel life tales that Sushant Singh Rajput incident can inspire

You and I must be among the millions waiting for the Sushant Singh Rajput story to hop from real life to reel life. Well, I don’t know about you, but I for one have given up smacking my lips in anticipation. Instead, I took the easy way out – I started dreaming. And this is what my dream told me about the films and OTT series soon to hit our screens:

Game of Clowns

This is a new twist to the mother of all web serials. It’s going to feature not Sushant’s ex-girlfriend, or her brother or the late actor’s sister or cook. This one is about the people who have ensured that there was never a dull moment in the story as they ranted and raved about it, viz., TV news anchors. They kept us glued to the screens, and depending on which anchor you are watching, the Sushant Singh case is obviously either a murder or a suicide. Appropriately, the series on their spell-binding antics is going to be called ‘Game of Clowns’.

Bandish Bandicoots

The old order yields place to the new – or at least that’s what the rule books say. But in reel life, the old order rebuffs the new. Newcomers are put down, mocked at and starved of assignments. Some of them end up making the ultimate sacrifice, viz., reconcile to never being invited to the 'Toffee With Taran' show. And then one day, along comes a young challenger who shakes up the world by doing something different like injecting into raag bhairavi some rap, reggae, and a reverse horn. Will the establishment crumble under the assault? Watch this space.

The Sher Dil Girl

A month ago, a movie about India’s first (or second or third – depending on who you listen to) woman pilot – Gunjan Saxena – kicked up a storm. But the controversy around the Kargil Girl is nothing compared to the controversy cooked up by the Sher Dil Girl with her statements. In 2006, Kangana Ranaut had bagged a Filmfare award for Best Debut Performance. Since then, she has won a clutch of trophies from all over. But she deserves a different medal now: for bravery or for fictional story telling – again, depending on whom you want to believe.

SSR’s Death – A Fast Forward

For those not cued in to Malayalam cinema, K.G. George had in 1983 had come up with a heart-wrenching film loosely based on the suicide of actress Shoba. Bollywood producers itching to do a re-make now have their chance. But there’s a twist – it’s going to be a fast-forward, and we look ahead to a distant future when the tables are turned. It won’t be youths from around the country coming to Mumbai in search of cinematic glory but aspirants from Mumbai aiming at stardom in Bhojpuri cinema traveling to Patna, Dharbhanga and, in a nod to vintage Radio Ceylon, to Jhumri Telaiya. Will the ‘Outsiders’ beat the system, and make it big? On the answer rests the fate of the forthcoming Bihar assembly elections.

Big Loss

Every news bulletin tells us that the skeletons which are soon going to tumble out of Udta Bollywood are the biggest names in the industry. But nobody can tell who’s speaking the truth. So we settle the matter out of court, viz., in a reality TV show. Is it the aging veteran who takes drugs for creative stimulation, or the brat who wants to insulate himself from his own insecurities or is the nymphet who wants to simply keep up with the gang? Or dare we say it… could it be all of them, and the producers too? Wait for the devastating denouement.

Cut Out a Letter

In 2017, when the film about a Rajput (no relative of Sushant) princess and Alauddin Khilji got into hot water, the producers came up with an ingenious solution. To demonstrate that the central character was not a historical figure, they lopped off the last letter, turning Padmavati into Padmavat. A possible non-starter then became a blockbuster epic. What an idea, sirji! One smart producer thought he would repeat that tried and tested formula to avoid all controversy. And his masterpiece titled ‘SSR’ became the politically loaded ‘SS’.

Alas, the Shiv Sena, which is part of the ruling coalition and dominates Mumbai’s civic body, refused to go by precedent. All hell broke loose, and Bollywood realized yet again that the formula doesn’t always work.

Three Million Idiots

Aamir Khar reprised ‘Three Idiots’ to point a finger at the real forces keeping the Sushant Singh Singh case on primetime at the expense of almost everything else – a raging pandemic, the tumbling economy and the tension on the China border. It’s not the media which is responsible, folks. Look within. It’s the three million idiots who lap up the stuff. And of course, the biggest idiot of them all, writing about it!

The opinions expressed in this article are those of the author's and do not purport to reflect the opinions or views of THE WEEK